Indomie "Mie Keriting Goreng Spesial"

Brand: Indomie
Flavour: Mie Keriting Goreng Spesial
Format: brick-in-packet
Packets: five
Identifiables: noodle brick, vegetable bits, soup base, thick soy sauce, chili paste, oniony oil
Sodium: 1.14 grams

Before I talk about today's noodle, I'd like to talk about cell phones. Right now, I'm using my T-Mobile G1, built on the Android platform, to take pictures. There are a number of reasons to use the G1: sleek and snappy user interface, 3G data network, fairly tight integration with Google's wealth of online tools, full keyboard, and it's not a freaking iPhone. If you care at all about the quality of the camera on your cell phone, however, it will disappoint greatly. Nothing frustrates quite like having to struggle through ten pictures to get one that doesn't have motion blur just to end up with a photo that has poor focus and lousy colour balance. This situation is far, far from ideal. It's also why I have no picture of the final product, but don't worry; it looks about like one would expect, namely noodles with brown sauce and veggie bits.

I'd also like to talk about world politics for a moment, but I won't. I have a noodle review to get to.

On the package, below the brand name, there is a small line of black all-caps text which reads, "Special Quality Instant Noodles". That's a good start. The line below that, larger and in mixed-case red type, reads, "Mie Keriting Goreng Spesial". Below that is another all-caps line like the first which reads, "Special Fried Curly Noodles". I suppose I can understand some subtle differences between these three lines. After all, one line says nothing about quality, one line says nothing about curly, and another line doesn't say much of anything in English. Still, I couldn't help but feel that somehow I was wotnessing a bit of overkill in the attempt to impart the notion of "special noodles" upon the consumer. Thus, these must be very special noodles indeed.

The brick of flat, slightly wide noodles is a bit larger than the usual Indomie packet but not as large as their jumbo packets. As always, however, the flavouring sachets are in a two-and-three configuration, and as always the ones with the liquid are pinked in exactly the wrong way. As noodled boiled and I opened tiny packets, I found myself imagining the reaction of the first envoy of an extraterrestrial species whose first contact with humanity was not through direct conversation or through bovine vivisection, but a packet of Indomie noodles.

"These Earth people really love their instant noodles, Captain Ach'kanaitsa," one would say to the other, bobbing his egg-shaped head.

"Yes," that one would say to the first, "but these flavouring sachets cannot be opened properly by either telekinesis or direct physical manipulation without their contents spilling uncontrollably, Dave!"

"Are you serious, Captain? Must I fetch a scissors?"

"No, Dave. If their civilisation is so primitive that they cannot figure out which edge of a packet to put the ridges on, then we'll need more than that to deal with them. Prepare the anti-neutron planet penetration beam!"

Earth would be totally demolished thank to poor packaging design. Thanks, Indomie!

Once I followed the directions – "Take out noodles from water and drained well" was my favourite part – I had a bowl of noodles which looked very much like every other Indomie dish, save for the addition of tine vegetable and TVP bits. That's about how the flavour worked out, also; moderately sweet and rich, though not so oniony as usual. I don't know about them being particularly special, but these noodles certainly are enjoyable. It's almost worth the very real risk of failed intergalactic relations.

Numbers: packaging 2, preparation 2, heat 3, flavour 4, overall 3
Music: III - Remastered Tracks Rockman Zero TELOS - Prismatic