Thai Kitchen "Spring Onion"

Brand: Thai Kitchen
Flavour: Spring Onion
Format: plastic bowl
Packets: three
Identifiables: loose noodles, flavour powder, veggie bits, oniony oil
Sodium: 1.36 grams

I don't like you anymore, Thai Kitchen, and I really wanted to.

For starters, the packaging of this bowl made little sense. The cardboard sleeve had tabs to pull it apart, as though one might wish to reassemble it later for a souvenir. Not even I do that. Then, the thin paper lid to the bowl tears when attempting to lift it, meaning that the attempt to retain a coherent enough lid that it acts like one is a tall order indeed. Then, I had to go digging around in the loose noodles to find the oil packet – which I only knew was in there because the instructions mentioned it – and after all that, it was the sort that needed to be opened very carefully lest it squirt oniony chili oil all over. That stuff is red. It stains.

Furthermore, the packaging tries to plain that the bowl is two servings. I know I let other ramen slide on this because it's sort of endearingly irritating (endearritating!) like a young puppy chewing on one's slippers. This is a product with careful focus-tested package design and flawless English. I want to tell it, "No, you're a big dog now, stop trying to eat my bloody couch!"

The couch-eater – I mean, the ramen bowl – was easy to assemble. Open packets, pour into bowl, four boiling water to line, cover for three minutes, and enjoy. Why do they always put that little assumption there? Enjoy? I'll be the judge of that.

It turns out that it's a very mixed bag in this case. The flavour is actually rather good, if you like lots of onion. I love lots of onion, so this is a real treat. The catch is, the noodles stayed disturbingly firm, and they're short. This means that they're very difficult to pick up with chopsticks because they don't drape and they're slick. Slurping them is right out. A spoon would make it genuinely impossible. What good is an oniony delight if I have to work so hard at eating it? The broth is incredibly satisfying, at least, but I don't think it really salvages the dish on the whole.

As an added note, I'm slightly annoyed because the battery compartment lid on the camera just broke. I might simply tape it in place. I place the blame squarely on you, Thai Kitchen!

Numbers: packaging 2, preparation 2, heat 2, flavour 4, overall 2
Music: Shnabubula - OC ReMix - Castlevania: Harmony of Dissonance Behold the Winged Cathedral